#023 - First Class Funk

"First Class Funk is an Indica-dominant Hybrid cross between GMO and Jet Fuel Gelato."

Hybrid (Indica leaning)


Overall Score:


The Flower

Strain Lineage: Kush dominant, slightly Afghan cross of GMO x Jet Fuel Gelato.

Pigment: To the naked eye, a slight eye sore due to the darker toned sugar leaves and minimal pistils present. However, when under the microscope, the features are much more captivating.

Ash Color: Light-grey in colour

Aroma: The aroma alone is something to foam over. The sour flavor that leaned in favor of lemons was softened by what reminded me of the chamomile flower which tasted sweet, floral, herbal, and bitter.

Trichomes: The microscope uncovered trichomes that shimmer like the distant stars in the sky on a dark night in the city. To the naked eye, I could tell they were present, but, the microscope confirmed that the trichome population was strong and healthy. All sessile-stalked for the most part, they were in the ripe stage of transitioning from translucent to creamy and amber in colour. For the most part they were clear with an amber tint.

Trim: It seemed that this cultivar was intentionally unfinished. There were were large and ample amounts of sugar leaves. However, not completely upsetting as the sugar leaves seemed to retain the moisture and did have healthy trichomes underneath.

The Experience (Spliff)

Duration: 3-4 hours
Climax: 3 – 45 mins

Initial: Immediately I was stimulated! I felt the sensation of my body unhinging, unwinding, and opening up one section at a time. First is was my head-top, the frontal lobe to be exact. Following that it was my solar plexus, and from there it made its way through the muscles of my back, arms, and legs. It felt like mini fireworks which spontaneously go off. From the first puff I wanted more, I immediately became glutenous and convinced myself to buy another batch. After taking only a couple of puffs my perspective became more goal-oriented, I was captivated and energized. The ridge of my mouth was tested as I inhaled the herb because the fireworks seemed to be quite active in that area. I must admit that I experienced a coughing fit… I wasn’t upset because the flower was well moist (too moist for some) but it helped to soften the blow. The smokes were bountiful, yet light but the terpenes were so fresh and the pit was fresh, clean, and triggering. I did feel like my body was on a mission to expel any excess phlegm and mucus from my airways at all costs. It was a bittersweet reaction because I needed it to be done, but also it was very aggressive.

Mid: Amid my highness, I was highly expressive and happy. I was overwhelmed with the need to smile and share fun times. I felt nostalgic about the whole experience. It was a blessing in disguise to find a kush/afghan dominate cultivar that his heavy, but, was refreshing at the same time! It feels like a reset, a start over, the beginning of something. I felt a sense of excitement, almost like I had butterflies. I believe the greatest highlight of this ride was that I didn’t want to get off it.

End: I believe the best part about this highness was the comedown. It was like following the sunrise to the sunset. I felt myself winding down and even I experience big yawns, but I wasn’t burnt out. That was a surprising fact considering the fact of how much I smoked considering the potency of the terpenes including cannabinoids was so high. I do believe this cultivar should be for experienced consumers because it can be hard to maintain self-control.

Flavour: Predominantly a floral, gassy, subtle spice flavour with a pronounced sour profile. The warm smoke felt fresh and clean.

Packaging: The packaging is magenta in color and made out of glass.

Activity Pairing: Socializing, meaningful conversations, finding inspiration, playing video games or even just hanging out.

Who we’d suggest this for: I would recommend this to someone who can appreciate a stinky, moist, fluffy, heavy hitting flower.

The Verdict

Yes! It’s one of the best premium flowers on the market being as aromatic, flavourful and heavy-hitting as it is. The Woods prides itself on having the best of the best and First Class Funk is certainly top-shelf.

Duration 8.7/10
Trim 7.5/10
Taste 7.8/10
Intensity 8.7/10
Packaging 8/10
Overall 8.3/10